An Open Letter

This is an open letter to all the amateur poets, songwriters and movie directors; and well also the cable news networks.

STOP!

Don’t feel the need to email me (and a couple of hundred/thousand other Democrats) your poems about Senator Obama, or your songs about Hillary.  They’re dreadful, simply terrible.   And why CNN and others feel the need to punish ups by showing them is beyond me.  Nobody needs to hear a middle aged man calling himself “Kid Brooklyn” yelling for a minute and a half about how he should be vice president.

So in conclusion, please I beg of you, feel free to keep your hidden “talents” hidden and to yourself.  We’ll both be happier in the long run.

Your,

Hank

Status Check

Cubs swept?  Check

Hamilton blown the world championship?  Check

Cowboys ran over by the Patriots?  Check

Absolutely no idea what’s going on in this election?  Check

At least Layer Cake was brilliant.  Yeah, I just finally got around to seeing Layer Cake.

A Note To Whom It Won’t Concern

Not that anybody actually read this, but if you happen upon it by mistake and wonder, no there won’t be many updates between now and the middle of November. There’s an election coming up that’s taking too much time.

My guess is there will be two more F1 posts and that’s about it for the next month and a half or so.

So my apologizes for making you accidentally stumble upon a blog that’s on life support.

Why Do I Blog?

Tim from Dayton posed a question that aside from his misplaced smugness, is all the same a worthwhile question; why do I blog? Is it for attention? Is it because I think I can make a living at it? What’s the deal?

No, it isn’t for attention; in fact if this blog were to become popular or in any way compromise who I am it would disappear, immediately. I don’t have the time or inclination to make this my primary purpose in life; and I cannot allow it to take over the rest of my life. As for blogging for a living; it just doesn’t strike me something I’d enjoy, I wasn’t built for deadlines.

Then why? Because its a good pressure release; and its good practice. I can anonymously rant and rave about things (and occasionally argue with the delusional like Tim from Dayton, who assumes he has all the answers to questions nobody’s asking) that bug me, and practice my critical writing at the same time. Churning out the same type of writing and arguments dulls your skills after while; its good to jump head first into a matter you don’t normally discuss. Its cathartic, and it really helps sharpen one’s skills. I can see that in the course of the arguments I made, they started out poorly and got better as it went on. The point wasn’t to be right, it was to be better.

So no Tim from Dayton, I don’t care if I get a lot of traffic, and I didn’t link to a post in hopes of getting traffic. I haven’t yet submitted a link to deadspin, and probably never will. As long as huckleberrys like you happen I don’t need to. I know that isn’t the answer you want, you so desperately want to think you’re better then me, but I can’t help you out here.

But hey, I still have a crappy banner, so you win. Try not to spend all that newfound pride in one place.

A Note from the Human Resources Department of the Globex Corporation

The Globex Corporation is pleased to announce the opening of the position of fanboy for Mr. Scorpio. This individual will work closely with Mr. Scorpio to help maintain his image, and promote his internet endeavors.

Duties will include:

• Relentlessly submiting Mr. Scorpio’s ramblings to the editors of deadspin.com. It is the only way to validate Mr. Scorpio’s existence.
• Oversee the banner project. It has become a top priority at the Globex Corporation to procure a banner; price is no object.
• Becoming inarticulate and lash out at other bloggers who disagree with Mr. Scorpio. Advanced skill in ad hominem attacks are a must.
• Maintain LJ’s wine inventory and intercept any errant wine boxes thrown in the direction of Mr. Scorpio.

Interested parties should send a resume and goals for world domination to the HR Department immediately. As Mr. Scorpio is a Cubs fan he’s willing to spend any amount to buy a championship caliber fanboy.

The Summer of Lists

Well I was working o a post about how great the Cubs are were playing in June but that doesn’t seem like a good idea in the midst of the current mauling they’re taking from the Brewers. So instead I’m going to do like every other media outlet and do a list. Or rather write about a list. They’re all the rage these days “AFI Top 100 Films” “Sports Center’s Top 50…” (I could care less what SC thinks the top 50 anything is, so I don’t actually know what their list is about) and USA Today’s Top 25 NFL players of the last 25 years.

 

But the list that got my attention was one compiled by the Dallas Morning News‘ Tim MacMahon; the Top 25 Cowboys of the last 25 years. Cowboys fans (myself included) are a rabid (and from the looks of the comments poor readers) lot who like to argue about… well everything. I spent my whole life in Indiana and have heard less arguments about the Colts the whole time, then I have about T.O. in the last year; its the nature of the beast.

 

So Mr. MacMahon created his list, and with it a lot of controversy. Leaving Danny White off was a mistake. Period. 3 NFC championship games and a Pro Bowl but him ahead of every QB but Aikman. How you leave a guy off who still holds club records is boggling. Luckily he came to his senses and replaced Russel Maryland with Danny. What Maryland was doing on there is a whole other question.

 

 

The Week in Hank

Hank made a fool of himself on LJ’s blog.  5 times in one week.

Hank got another year older.

Hank’s Another Year Older

I got nothing today.

I got a cool birthday post from LJ.  And a pic of my niece.

Come Share in My (No Longer) Secret Shame

So LJ conned (by which I mean she offered and I jumped at the chance; stupid Hank) a few of us into sharing our 5 favorite “guilty pleasure songs.”  Today’s list have a few clunkers in them, that’s for sure.  So be sure to stop by and throw fruit at us.

Hank Discovers There’s Music on the Internet